Queen of Dreams Radio
Posts Tagged ‘Spiritual Growth’
Mark asked me the other day how I can write about three or four days for so many posts. WHAT is so important? What could you possibly say for so many posts?
Hmmm, that’s a great question, I thought.
Everything and nothing at all.
One of the things I noticed the most on that trip was a surreal type of energy that would envelop me at the oddest times… and would finally come to a heightened sense of ‘Hey, listen to me!’ the last day.
This energy, if I had to describe it was sparkly like stars in a flume of rainbow currents. Beautiful, inviting and magical. I so wish you could share in it.
Yesterday, as I described this feeling, I said, “Have you ever been talking to someone and it felt like they got really close to you even though they didn’t move?” Thankfully… she said, “Yes. I know that feeling.” If you know that feeling… it’s that same feeling, but not as magnetic… more flowy and spacious.
What a sweet messenger it is to heighten the awareness!
Before I left, in a prayer, I heard… trust and go, Tina. And I did… not knowing what the trip would hold in store for me. I knew it would be good – everything felt good around it. How wonderful!
For many weeks prior to leaving, I ‘felt’… I need ‘space.’
The Intellectual part of me thought I need WORK space…
Physically, I felt like I needed more space … new house with cathedral ceilings (so we talked to a realtor about listing our house)…
Emotionally, I felt like I needed time alone…
On a soul level, I felt like I was expanding and I had to find space where I could grow larger…
Energetically, I felt like I was being called home…
Many things happened with this attention… offers for office space. A realtor who came over and went over our current house… and a week in a house that has cathedral ceilings (in San Diego). On the emotional, I created time alone and space alone… but still wanted more. On the soul level, several expansion meditations were shared, and energetically, I felt like I came home when I got to California.
It wasn’t until I was in the presence of the ocean that I realized it was my heart that was asking for beauty and expansion … and then I felt satisfied in the presence of the ocean and the beauty, and I actually stood there exhaling feeling like… ah, I made it. I felt like I could run my energy across the ocean as far as it could go and let go…truly let go and surrender.
What a gift…
and all I had to do was trust.
How do you thank God for loving you so very much? Mmmm, I believe we live fully. When I woke one day, I found myself bathed in luxury linen. A fluffy feather pillow flock, a feather duvet and also a feather pillow top that rested squarely on top of a pillow top mattress. Can you say Divine!? 
Thanks Cy!
I found myself lying quietly in bed enjoying how every part of my body felt nestled in this luxury. I felt warm. I felt comfortable. I felt safe and happy.
I looked out the floor to ceiling sliding glass door and saw the lemon-lime tree that stood just a few feet outside in the backyard. I could feel my energy flowing around this beautiful little bush and I could feel its vibrancy. It felt a little like electricity… zippy and happy. From my fluffy place in bed, I looked out and felt myself oddly feeling extremely happy and, all at once, I felt like I had been there before. All at once I felt homesick for some reason.
When I got out of bed, Cy (Abby’s boyfriend) and I sipped yummy coffee and chatted about what had just happened. Cy began to say something and all of a sudden, the same feeling came back in spades… I felt like I remember living somewhere where I had been snuggled in a bed on a porch of some sort or outside terrace, and I could look outside at beauty from the comfort of my own space. I felt tears burning my eyes as I felt even more homesick thinking about the feeling. While I let it run through me, I didn’t question its validity or truth. I didn’t go to my mind to ‘figure’ it out… just enjoyed the feeling – homesick and all. Cy said… “You’ve been there before.” I agree… although I have no idea what that means.
Thank you, Cy, for making my trip so beautiful, so comfortable and so memorable. From my heart to yours… I’m deeply grateful!
There we were…fed and happy. I couldn’t shake the feeling that felt like energy had emanated from every place in the little cafe that opened its doors to the street. I loved the indoor interior with its little ceramic and metal birds. Ah, the flight theme again… time to fly, time to fly.
Floating around the streets of Del Mar and La Jolla, we had a great time. On one of the days, we found ourselves at a little bookstore and met a wonderful teacher named N’Vela… what a delight. She looked at me and shared a few bits of wisdom that I can barely remember now – something about my book and distribution. What I remember most is her chat with Abby. I could literally feel her access Abby’s spirit and affirm her place on a stage in front of many, many people. ‘How beautiful!’ I thought as I watched Abby beam in appreciation. Gifts, gifts everywhere I thought to myself. How beautiful we are when we all connect with God.
From there, we took a trip of trust with our beautiful messengers… right, left and around again. How wonderful to play. We ended up in LaJolla looking at an apartment for rent and how wonderful it was to really sink into the idea of spending six months out of the year less than a block from the ocean in LaJolla. I had no idea it was so affordable. I had so many beliefs about what things cost in California (in my mind, I’m thinking it is $$60K a week or so from watching various tv shows), I would never even permit myself to consider this a dream. How interesting… and how exciting!
I’ve continued to revel in the bliss I’m bathed in since this trip. I find myself in a dreamy state of knowing all is well. It feels too good to be true sometimes, and then I talk to one of our clients who is also experiencing the bliss and I’m reminded we are always together… never apart.
When I woke the next morning, Abby and I talked about whether or not we wanted to go to her weekly networking event called ABRA. I felt a definite “Yes” and so we quickly got ourselves ready and flew out the door to the meeting.
The group was a gift itself. These heart-centered people had such open ideas about what it means to truly serve through business, and I got to see the world’s largest pancakes – who says everything in Texas is bigger?
From there, we went to lunch at Claire’s on Cedros. What a quaint little cafe… the food was so yummy. While we were there, I noticed this very odd sensation. This band of energy felt as if it was permeating the entire restaurant. I looked over at Abby and she still looked the same, but everyone else in the restaurant looked different.
I continued to tune into this energy and felt strands of light come from across the room where a man was sitting by himself. He looked over at me and we stared at each other for what felt like eons. I felt moved to go say hi to him, but I quickly retreated to my mind and wondered, “What on earth would I say to him?” I continued enjoying the luminous energy I felt between us, and then turned my attention back to the other feeling in the room. All at once, everything felt real and not real at the same time. The people seemed real and not real at the same time.
I had no idea what to do with this ‘noticing,’ but asked Abby if she felt it. She said no. I tried to explain what I felt, but it didn’t make any sense so I let it go.
Little did I know that the energy would come back many more times over the next few days.
Look for Part Tres in a few days!