Queen of Dreams Radio
Posts Tagged ‘Love Yourself’
In the flap of Susan Boyle’s new CD, she dedicates her new CD, I Dreamed a Dream, to her mother. She writes, “to my beloved Mother, to whom I made a promise to be someone.”
I completely ‘get’ what that means…perhaps not what Susan ‘meant’ as I can never know her heart, but I do see so many people…and many times myself…thinking that they must ‘be’ something or accomplish something to be ‘someone.’
The truth is you are already someone. You are a sister to a sibling, a mother to a child, a teacher to a student, a student to a teacher, an example, a dreamer, a person of faith, a child of God. You are already all of these things and so much more. Every day, in every way you touch people all around you. You choose each day what being someone means to you.
Don’t wait for ‘someday’ to be ‘someone’… be you right now!
I’ll join you!
I just lost a week of my life! I have not been this ‘busy’ in a very LONG time – mostly by choice. Last week taught me WHY I unplugged from everything. WHY I made choices to uphold what is important to me.
WOW.
I lost a week of my life… where WAS I? I realize I was present with my clients. With Chance. With Mark, mostly. But, where was my time? GONE! *Poof* In an instant… shazam! Dissolved into thin air.
When Friday came I was gone… literally and figuratively. I was empty. I had nothing left. I even rescheduled a beloved client because I literally did not feel like I was at my best.
Am I kicking myself? No. But you better believe that I made changes for this week! And, that really is how contrast works. We get an experience and we say, “Nope… this is NOT what I want.” then we create something new from that moment.
This week, I have clients, writing to attend to. THIS BLOG that went into my hyper vortex last week! And…yes… me. I have a very important appointment with myself. As well as Chance, Mark and clients I love.
I know, without a doubt, that for me to be optimal I MUST have time to process. I require more than most people, I’m sure. I had a friend who used to take three to four days per month to go be by himself. We all know what it is for us. For me, I need big, juicy chunks. Two hours is best. One will do. Less than that and I’ll vacate my body and go into the ethers to ‘make space’ for myself. Not the best for living in the world. Truly.
My family amazes me with how loving they are about this requirement knowing that when I take care of me they get the best of me.What’s your optimal? Play with it and see … you can have what you ask for.
Mary sent this to me! She is an amazing designer and creator of super crafty, wonderfully artsy things.
Isn’t it sooo cute?
Can you read what it says? Open Your Gifts…time with you via email or phone or in person is my gift.
Thank you!
Oh wow… look at that. Another year has gone by. Lots of years have passed since I first sprang into this world – 41, in fact.
I find that I really don’t think much about age until someone brings it up, or until I talk to someone who doesn’t know much about the 80s (when we get to ‘explain’ the jokes or how funny things were back then).
The older I get the more I realize life really is all about love. And we all have our special brand of it.
It’s perfect, really.
You are perfect, really.
So am I.
Let’s celebrate together!
Chance drew this for me…I love his drawings! I would have never thought to have balloons coming OUT of a mouth… so CREATIVE! And these words… crazy…yummy…party…love you…yay!
So sweet!
My last show was a bit more emotional than I usually get. Perhaps it is my heart… perhaps it is my unwillingness to sit by and watch … perhaps it is my love for you (and me) that I remind us to care for ourselves.
I find myself wondering what else I can say. What words matter? Love yourself… yeah, yeah, yeah… who cares? What does that mean anyway? a client recently said. I agree… the words are hollow.
Perhaps it is about caring for yourself. Is that any better? Care for yourself… yeah, yeah, yeah… who cares?
Okay, then think about someone you deeply love now. A child, a parent, a friend… and think about how much you love that person and how you would want the best for that person no matter what.
That’s what we’re talking about… that love. That feeling. Now apply it to yourself.
I have not always acted like I loved my gifts, but I don’t know that I would ever want to trade them in. That said, there’s something about seeing cancer or other diseases up close and personal in the body. I have worked with the beautiful healers as they have cleared a person of thousands and thousands of harsh words, or cleaned out a person’s blood bit by bit of chemicals.
I am in awe of their love and their desire to serve, and I wonder… could we maybe help a bit? Not being sassy here… but could we possibly love ourselves just a wee bit more? Or maybe open up to receiving the help some?
One of the hardest things for people to see and know is how they are hard on themselves…I remember how I defended myself and how “good” I was being toward myself. Ha! I could only hope to be good to myself at that moment in time. I cruelly tormented myself with doubts. Ah, to learn what is true.
So as we lay our friends down to sleep…Billy Mays, Jr.…Michael Jackson…Farrah Fawcett…Ed McMahon…personal friends near and far… can we find it in our hearts to honor their memories by loving ourselves and those around us just a tiny bit more? I hope so… love is waiting for you! You are love!
You all have been so funny! I love getting your emails about hair (though I have been tardy with responses – I’ve been out and about – best way to contact me if you need a response is through Brandie – she will handle everything!).
So, you’ve been asking about the HAIR! I went to our Goddess Image Consultant, and she is AMAZING. Did I say AMAZING??? Truly. Now I know why people RAVE and LOVE their hairdressers!
I’m nearly 41 (birthday coming up in July), and I have never had a hair stylist like this – so glad I do now! I literally floated out of her place feeling loved, adored and cared for. It felt like we were two friends who had not seen each other in a very long time. We talked non-stop for THREE HOURS!
Anyway, here’s the scoop of what happened. I washed my hair and let it drip dry. My hair is thick and has these spiral curls (the ones I had NO IDEA what to do with after they arrived with Chance’s delivery). I wanted her to see what I’m dealing with, after all. I probably looked like a distant cousin of Cousin IT – nearly one length hair, down to my waist. Very Liz Tyler in Lord of the Rings, but not as glam… a bit frizzy, a bit dry.
She greeted me at the door with such enthusiasm I felt pulled into her orbit. SHE truly IS a GODDESS! Then, I saw her house was painted in the luscious shimmery, Ralph Lauren metallic paints I’ve been drawn toward lately – THAT’S IT – I’m painting my creative room in these, too. Word of warning… she said it took them FIVE coats to get this look – not a weekend warrior type of undertaking, for sure!
I got to see her house and all of the beauty she has created. Happy, happy, happy!
We talked about my hair. We talked about my lifelong hair process… cut my hair, grow it out, cut my hair, grow it out… BOR-ING. I told her that I really don’t want to spend a lot of time on it… I want something that looks great and is LOW MAINTENANCE. By now, I pretty much have acknowledged that fact that I’m not going to turn into Miz Hair High Maintenance.
She reassured me that everything was GOING TO BE FINE! And, I actually BELIEVED her – yeah!
Now, you may not believe this if you go to someone who already does all of this, but she took an hour to teach me about some products, showed me EXACTLY what to do to get my hair to do what I want. And, made everything feel extremely easy. I secretly thought…maybe this IS going to work.
In the past, I would ask about the curls… what to do about the curlzzzzz??? And people would point to a bottle and say, this is good. After our Goddess got finished with me, I knew which products to use, why they WOULD work, and I actually had the CONFIDENCE in using them. Ever spend $20 bucks on something and use it the wrong way?
She cut layers into it, the back is probably six inches shorter. I didn’t have that ‘where’s my hair’ experience in the shower, so that is good. PLUS, she kept reassuring me that I’m GORGEOUS and I CAN wear my hair long and it can be fabulous! This, too, I really believed because I FELT beautiful. 
When I left, I felt so great I floated over to get a manicure/pedicure at my local shop. When I walked in, the only customer in the place (it was 3 in the afternoon on a weekday) said, “Wow, you look great!” I smiled KNOWING that it was my aura… truly filled to the brim with love. The same customer commented on my new purse, too, which our Goddess also loved – that’s a whole other story I’ll post about in a couple of days with a photo!
That’s when I started thinking about my experience. Our Goddess lady BELIEVES in all of her heart that true beauty comes from within. That’s exactly what she brings out in others. I’ve never paid $90 for a haircut…but a haircut with her is an EXPERIENCE – one that adds to me in so many other ways. Before, I thought of getting my hair done in terms of function … who can do my hair well, and do it fast (not everyone wants to tackle my mane with highlights!). I never thought to ask for anything else… but I kept floating around, bobbing from place to place, and this last time when I asked, I asked for “the best hair stylist for me.”
God knows what we want and what is best for us beyond what we can even imagine! Let me think about what I would have had to ask for to get this beautiful Goddess to come … Dear God, I’d like to have an ayurveda cooking, inner beauty teaching, master of the physical plane hairdresser who loves women and teaching them to look their best. Oh, and while you are at it, can you include a soul connection and someone who loves organic products who enjoys teaching people to actually use the products?
When people ask me about how to ask… I always say… take the stress (also resistance) off and just ask for what is best for you and be open to how that shows up.
Boy, am I glad I did! I’ll post photos soon… promise! I’ve been doing the french twist thing allowing my hair to recover from how mean I’ve been to it (apparently you aren’t supposed to BRUSH curly hair like this… who knew?) All you curly girls out there – stop laughing!
I do have to say, though, I discovered some pretty limiting beliefs while I was there. Let me share a few…
1. Most hairdressers I’ve gone to fall into two sales camps for products… not selling at all, which just means that they don’t tell you about any products, and selling full force, which means it usually feels akin to a used car salesman. When our Goddess took so much care to ensure I know how to use the products, and told me WHY these are the best (Aveda), and HOW they work with hair rather than against it, I naturally wanted to buy them, AND I didn’t feel like I was being sold something. But, even before I asked her, I knew she wasn’t trying to sell me anything (she doesn’t even carry product). That’s when I realized I have a little belief stuck in the background about having my defenses up around ‘being sold.’ Tsk, tsk… no need for that as there is no need to be defensive when you are courageous, bold and fearless!
2. Because I approached my hair as a functional process, and my entire focus has been on the function parts (cut, highlights, color), I totally missed out on the experience I could have. When I left our Goddess, I flashed back to many previous stylists who talked all about their stuff (boyfriend troubles, girlfriend troubles, gossip, etc.), asked me about what to do about things (think therapy session), and how it wasn’t relaxing at all! I’m sure this experience is in direct alignment with me truly loving me and nurturing me. I love me, the world loves me. We do create our world!
3. One of the things I’ve really been noticing in so many ways is how we each can contribute in our own unique way. Being with our Goddess allowed me to see me…how I can be zany, quiet, fun, introspective, lively, lovely, and everything else in between and how that can be valuable to others. I adore how this woman is such a role model…she has done it all! I realized when I left how I do hold back…I don’t want to be in the spotlight – that’s not good to LOVE soaking up all that love, right? What do our well-intentioned parents say… Be humble, don’t get full of yourself! And, yet, I see that by believing we have something to share (and being willing to be in the spotlight) is the process by which we share ourselves with the world. Now, that one (don’t shine too brightly) has to go!
Oh my gosh… you all are going to totally laugh when you read this. When I blogged about how I secretly wish my hair was like this, but that I wouldn’t ‘do’ this because it would be too much trouble – I went to look for a photo of what my hair looks like now… VOILA! I have hair like this! And those ringlets that Miss Underwood has… mine does that automatically! Ya-hoo! Did I mention that we create our world? The Goddess cut my hair in the way she thought best and it just so happened that what I love… is best! How fun is that?
You all have been so funny! I love getting your emails about hair (though I have been tardy with responses – I’ve been out and about – best way to contact me if you need a response is through Brandie – she will handle everything!).
So, you’ve been asking about the HAIR! I went to our Goddess Image Consultant, and she is AMAZING. Did I say AMAZING??? Truly. Now I know why people RAVE and LOVE their hairdressers!
I’m nearly 41 (birthday coming up in July), and I have never had a hair stylist like this – so glad I do now! I literally floated out of her place feeling loved, adored and cared for. It felt like we were two friends who had not seen each other in a very long time. We talked non-stop for THREE HOURS!
Anyway, here’s the scoop of what happened. I washed my hair and let it drip dry. My hair is thick and has these spiral curls (the ones I had NO IDEA what to do with after they arrived with Chance’s delivery). I wanted her to see what I’m dealing with, after all. I probably looked like a distant cousin of Cousin IT – nearly one length hair, down to my waist. Very Liz Tyler in Lord of the Rings, but not as glam… a bit frizzy, a bit dry.
She greeted me at the door with such enthusiasm I felt pulled into her orbit. SHE truly IS a GODDESS! Then, I saw her house was painted in the luscious shimmery, Ralph Lauren metallic paints I’ve been drawn toward lately – THAT’S IT – I’m painting my creative room in these, too. Word of warning… she said it took them FIVE coats to get this look – not a weekend warrior type of undertaking, for sure!
I got to see her house and all of the beauty she has created. Happy, happy, happy!
We talked about my hair. We talked about my lifelong hair process… cut my hair, grow it out, cut my hair, grow it out… BOR-ING. I told her that I really don’t want to spend a lot of time on it… I want something that looks great and is LOW MAINTENANCE. By now, I pretty much have acknowledged that fact that I’m not going to turn into Miz Hair High Maintenance.
She reassured me that everything was GOING TO BE FINE! And, I actually BELIEVED her – yeah!
Now, you may not believe this if you go to someone who already does all of this, but she took an hour to teach me about some products, showed me EXACTLY what to do to get my hair to do what I want. And, made everything feel extremely easy. I secretly thought…maybe this IS going to work.
In the past, I would ask about the curls… what to do about the curlzzzzz??? And people would point to a bottle and say, this is good. After our Goddess got finished with me, I knew which products to use, why they WOULD work, and I actually had the CONFIDENCE in using them. Ever spend $20 bucks on something and use it the wrong way?
She cut layers into it, the back is probably six inches shorter. I didn’t have that ‘where’s my hair’ experience in the shower, so that is good. PLUS, she kept reassuring me that I’m GORGEOUS and I CAN wear my hair long and it can be fabulous! This, too, I really believed because I FELT beautiful.
When I left, I felt so great I floated over to get a manicure/pedicure at my local shop. When I walked in, the only customer in the place (it was 3 in the afternoon on a weekday) said, “Wow, you look great!” I smiled KNOWING that it was my aura… truly filled to the brim with love. The same customer commented on my new purse, too, which our Goddess also loved – that’s a whole other story I’ll post about in a couple of days with a photo!
That’s when I started thinking about my experience. Our Goddess lady BELIEVES in all of her heart that true beauty comes from within. That’s exactly what she brings out in others. I’ve never paid $90 for a haircut…but a haircut with her is an EXPERIENCE – one that adds to me in so many other ways. Before, I thought of getting my hair done in terms of function … who can do my hair well, and do it fast (not everyone wants to tackle my mane with highlights!). I never thought to ask for anything else… but I kept floating around, bobbing from place to place, and this last time when I asked, I asked for “the best hair stylist for me.”
God knows what we want and what is best for us beyond what we can even imagine! Let me think about what I would have had to ask for to get this beautiful Goddess to come … Dear God, I’d like to have an ayurveda cooking, inner beauty teaching, master of the physical plane hairdresser who loves women and teaching them to look their best. Oh, and while you are at it, can you include a soul connection and someone who loves organic products who enjoys teaching people to actually use the products?
When people ask me about how to ask… I always say… take the stress (also resistance) off and just ask for what is best for you and be open to how that shows up.
Boy, am I glad I did! I’ll post photos soon… promise! I’ve been doing the french twist thing allowing my hair to recover from how mean I’ve been to it (apparently you aren’t supposed to BRUSH curly hair like this… who knew?) All you curly girls out there – stop laughing!
I do have to say, though, I discovered some pretty limiting beliefs while I was there. Let me share a few…
1. Most hairdressers I’ve gone to fall into two sales camps for products… not selling at all, which just means that they don’t tell you about any products, and selling full force, which means it usually feels akin to a used car salesman. When our Goddess took so much care to ensure I know how to use the products, and told me WHY these are the best (Aveda), and HOW they work with hair rather than against it, I naturally wanted to buy them, AND I didn’t feel like I was being sold something. But, even before I asked her, I knew she wasn’t trying to sell me anything (she doesn’t even carry product). That’s when I realized I have a little belief stuck in the background about having my defenses up around ‘being sold.’ Tsk, tsk… no need for that as there is no need to be defensive when you are courageous, bold and fearless!
2. Because I approached my hair as a functional process, and my entire focus has been on the function parts (cut, highlights, color), I totally missed out on the experience I could have. When I left our Goddess, I flashed back to many previous stylists who talked all about their stuff (boyfriend troubles, girlfriend troubles, gossip, etc.), asked me about what to do about things (think therapy session), and how it wasn’t relaxing at all! I’m sure this experience is in direct alignment with me truly loving me and nurturing me. I love me, the world loves me. We do create our world!
3. One of the things I’ve really been noticing in so many ways is how we each can contribute in our own unique way. Being with our Goddess allowed me to see me…how I can be zany, quiet, fun, introspective, lively, lovely, and everything else in between and how that can be valuable to others. I adore how this woman is such a role model…she has done it all! I realized when I left how I do hold back…I don’t want to be in the spotlight – that’s not good to LOVE soaking up all that love, right? What do our well-intentioned parents say… Be humble, don’t get full of yourself! And, yet, I see that by believing we have something to share (and being willing to be in the spotlight) is the process by which we share ourselves with the world. Now, that one (don’t shine too brightly) has to go!
Oh my gosh… you all are going to totally laugh when you read this. When I blogged about how I secretly wish my hair was like this, but that I wouldn’t ‘do’ this because it would be too much trouble – I went to look for a photo of what my hair looks like now… VOILA! I have hair like this! And those ringlets that Miss Underwood has… mine does that automatically! Ya-hoo! Did I mention that we create our world? The Goddess cut my hair in the way she thought best and it just so happened that what I love… is best! How fun is that?
A few days ago, Mark and I took my sleigh in for a check-up. I noticed this very slight vibration in the steering wheel and had no idea what it could be.
As we stood there at Sears, a young couple caught my attention. They had three children of their own, and one of the youngsters looked to be at least 12, so I knew they couldn’t be that young. I kept looking over at them, almost like I was glued energetically to them. All of a sudden, in my mind I saw them as little kids in adult clothes.
I know I fell into their energy, and I could feel their fear… money, tight, car repairs, *gulp*…and kids need shoes, clothes, sports, summer camp.
It made me think about a time about a year ago when everywhere I went all I saw were children – the inner child of every person was all I could see. It was quite unnerving, and I just wanted it to stop. And it finally did.
So here I am, standing in the auto bay at Sears experiencing this again, and I am wondering what I need to know. Why are you here?
This is what I learned…
We are all children. We are loved just like these children are loved by their parents, and the children’s children are loved, and on and on it goes in an infinite loop of love.
When we go into fear it is because we feel we need to know the answer – that we must need to have the answer. When we try to know this with our little finite minds, it will never work. It will never feel good. We will feel limited because we are using that part of us that is limited. When we open up to the greater part of who we are – that which is infinite – then we will experience infinite everything – infinite love, infinite resources, infinite support.
And, when we begin to be the children of God that we truly are, we will be like children again…trusting, loving, playing…infinitely provided for in all that we are.
I love you… no matter where you are, no matter what you have done, no matter how you feel about yourself… I love you. Pass the love on…
This is too funny not to share. I can’t *WAIT* to get photos to put up here! My mom called me a few weeks ago, and was so excited I thought she might actually PEE her pants!
Anyway, she was gushing about something or other she found at First Monday Trades Days over in Canton, Texas (just east of Dallas). She goes on and on about how she can’t WAIT to give me my birthday present. She knows EXACTLY what she is going to give me, and she just has to have me go pick out THE ONE I want, but she can’t TELL me what it is because it is a SURPRISE!
So, last weekend we went out to see Dusty Rose (a.k.a. mom) and she is as excited as a little puppy at 12 weeks old (and you know how much they wag their tales and all that. She is nearly SQUEALING as she shows me what she is going to get me, but NOT like the one she has because it is just TOO SMALL, and I need a BIG one.)
So what is it?
It was an iron heart with wings. But not just any heart… THIS one was SHINY and SPARKLY and PINK! Yeeee! Happy, happy, happy days!
Then, after she caught her breath, she took one big inhale, and then blurted out that SHE is ALSO going to get a gift when we go TODAY to get my birthday gift (she can’t wait until mid July to give it to me), and guess what she is getting?
You guessed it… or maybe you didn’t!
A FLYING PIG! But not just any ordinary flying pig, THIS flying pig is polka dotted! (And, of course, we have lots of pig stories in our family, including the CONCRETE PIG mom gave me 20 years ago that weighed 150 POUNDS! No, seriously…doesn’t everyone have a garden pig?)
Now, I think I’m just about as excited as she was, and I’ll try not to pee my pants until I get there to see them! More photos to come!
I went to the dentist last week, and the receptionist typed in my birthday wrong so on my record it said I was 57 years old. When the dentist came out to the lobby, he looked around and was confused – where was the 57 year old?
He called my name, I responded and we walked back to the patient area. There, another assistant looked at me in a puzzled way. She said, “How old are you?” And I replied, “I’m 40.”
She looked at the screen, looked at me again, and said, “When is your birthday?” I gave her my digits as she updated the record, then she looked at me again. “How old did you say you are?”
“I’m 40,” I said. “I’m sure you were really confused looking for a 57 year old!”
The other dentist said, “I thought, wow, way to go – looking good for nearly 60!”
Then the assistant said, “You look like you are in your late 20s – possibly early 30s, but certainly not 40 and not anywhere near 57!”
We laughed as I shared various stories about how people have asked me if I’ve ‘ever’ stepped out into the sun a day in my life.
All vanity aside, sometimes it is nice to have these experiences where people who have no clue who you are, have no idea about what you care about simply say…good job. No one seemed to bring up the idea that I’m overweight…or that I was there because my crown broke a tooth (lovely)…or that I had thrown my hair up into a bun that day without much thought.
It makes me think about how sometimes we can only see what we want to see. See, what isn’t right, what isn’t perfect, what isn’t real…and just as easily, we can see what is beautiful. YOU are beautiful…just like this sweet, sweet lady… can you see her beautiful spirit?
I remember when I was a kid, my grandmother would take me to the nursing home with her. This was long, long before the swanky retirement villages of today – many of these people were very ill and very old. I remember how comfortable I felt there – and how safe I felt. Perhaps it was partly due to my grandmother, but I believe it was more that these people had an incredible amount of love to share and I didn’t want anything from them – we could just ‘be’ ourselves together. Me, hugging them and loving them just for who they were, and them loving me and loving me for who I was. This photo reminds me of those people…and of my grandmother when she got much, much older lost to Alzheimers and talking about stuffed bunnies that bite. If we are lucky, we too, someday will grow very, very old.
I’ve had a chance to talk to a few people the last few days who have reminded me of how far I’ve come in the last few years. Most of you know I went through a big life shift, ego shattering, dark night of the soul [insert what you will for hell here] a few years ago. And, even though it was hard, tough, what have you I would never, ever change anything because the clarity I have now, the sense of who I am, the love for myself, the connection with the Creator and Divine messengers that flows so easily are all part of my most cherished experiences.
Bumping up against the past, realizing that people take a snapshot of us, put a description on it and then label it as ‘you’ [insert name here] is challenging to the ego when you’ve moved along the continuum and the ‘you’ that you know is no longer a match to that. That was ‘you’ then, this is ‘you’ now.
The ego-mind wants control – always. Forever it is trying to make things what it wants. And, that includes trying to manage everyone else’s perceptions of who ‘you’ are.
Fugettaboutit…there’s no way to ever win that ego-mind war. But, the very best thing you can do to better deal with it is to gain clarity by letting go. Clarity of who you are, clarity of purpose, clarity of spirit, clarity of gifts, and then act in alignment with that clarity. Soon, your photo gets updated and you’ll get a new description in that person’s mind, and even perhaps, a new label.
Above all… love every part of who you are, where you’ve been, and what you’ve created…it’s all part of YOUR journey. And, don’t forget, pictures are taken all along the way!
